Positive Thinking - The Problems
A quick look beyond the covers of any self-help book and you will find the same, possibly dangerous, rhetoric of positive thinking.\
You have a really bad day at work - just think positively...
Your relationship ends terribly - just think positively, there is a silver lining...
Superficially subscribers to what is termed Positive Thinking , tend to be endorsing an attitude to lief in which 'the darker side' is repressed, or given short shrift. Indeed any philosophical approach in which personal realities are polished or shrouded may contain a problem.
Put more directly, if you focus on only the positive aspects of your life, then you are in danger of discounting (repressing) other parts of you life.
In short you are creating a fluffy reality - one in which the gulf between what you are feeling and you are allowing yourself to feel grows.
Jung spoke of the idea of our shadow and maintained that enlightenment was not about finding the light, but shining the light into the darkness.
In terms of our ability to 'bounce' back from difficulties, our emotional resilience, denying the light in the shadow and the shadow in the light does not the 'skill' of 'bouncing back' to be practised or developed.
No I am not for one minute saying that we should adopt morose attitude to life, what I am saying is that there needs to be a desire to 'walk in balance'. It's as ok to 'sad' as it is to be 'happy' as long as you 'own' those feelings as yours. Such ownership can encourage deeper and more relevant personal development.
Again to put another spin on things...
If you refuse to see the pain, does not mean that the pain ceases to exist.
I may not like the darkness, and I may prefer to stay in the light, but simply thinking about the light does not mean we actually have 24 hours of sunlight.
The challenge is about exploring the causes (attachments to) of sadness as well the causes (attachments to) happiness. In a forthcoming book I explore the idea of happiness in a bit more detail, but for now its worth your consideration to question 'what happiness means to me?'
Stoic philosophers maintained that any event is just an event. It is the meaning that we attach to each event which gives it its importance.
To be mindlessly happy despite the intensity of any event is to fail to explore the real attachments you place upon it.
In a spiritual sense, such denial does make personal enlightenment a bit of a challenge.
Recording of White Ribbon Campaign feature on Coast FM
Transmitted : 24/11/17 on Coast 2 Coast, Coast FM
This coming Saturday is White Ribbon Day
The White Ribbon CampaignUK is part of a global movement to put a stop to male violence against women and girls.
This is very much a MANS issue, and it is women who are disempowered, harassed and abused by the behaviours of men.
The White Ribbon UK website notes that ...
Men and boys have a crucial role to play in creating a culture where male violence, abuse and harassment against women and girls are simply seen as unacceptable. We support them to take a stand against gender violence in their workplaces, schools, communities and families.
The 25th November, the world marks International Day for the Elimination of Violence against Women, also known as White Ribbon Day. From then until the 10th December, we encourage everybody to take part in the 16 Days of Activism against gender-based violence.
Most men are not violent towards women, but many of us ignore the problem, or see it as something which doesn't have anything to do with us. We need to join women and women's organisations in taking action to end the problem.
You can take a stand against violence now and sign our personal pledge never to commit, condone or remain silent about men's violence against women by visiting the White Ribbon Campaign Website
Created using Visme. An easy-to-use Infographic Maker.
A Walk in the Woods
A Walk In The Woods Test – Relational Psychology Test
Following on with the them of personality tests ...
This is what they call a relational psychology test.
The answers to these questions indicate relevance to values that you hold in your personal life.
Have a piece of paper and a pen to hand - and as ever remember the caveat; treat this as a source of personal reflection and not as any kind of diagnosis.
As you read the description answer the questions as they appear; do not read ahead.
Picture yourself walking through a beautiful forest.
The sun is out, there's a perfect breeze.
It's just beautiful.
Who are you walking with?
As you continue on in your walk through the forest, you come across an animal.
What kind of animal is it?
You walk up to the animal.
What does the animal do?
You're walking deeper into the woods yet, and you come to a clearing. There's a house in the middle of the clearing.
How big is it?
Is it fenced in or no?
You walk up to the door of the home and it's open a bit.
You enter and see a table.
Describe what's on the table.
You finish looking around the house and leave out the back door.
There's a huge lawn and in the centre is a garden. In the garden, you find a cup.
What is the cup made out of?
What do you do with the cup?
As you walk to the end of the garden, you find yourself at a body of water.
What kind of body of water is it? A lake? River? Pond?
You must cross this water in order to get home.
How wet do you get?
So now for some possible interpretations ...
The person you were walking with is the most important person in your life.
The size of the animal you come across is a representation of the size of your problems.
If your action was more severe, it means you tend to be more aggressive.
If it was peaceful, then more passive.
The size of your home is representative of the size of your ambition.
If there was no fence around the home, it means you tend to be more open.
If what you saw on the table wasn't food, people, or flowers, it indicates some possible unhappiness.
How durable the cup you found was is representative of how strong your relationship is with the person in the first part of the story.
What you do with it is representative of your attitude toward them.
The size of the body of water is related to the size of your sexual drive.
If you became very wet, it indicates that sex is important to you.
If not very wet, it may mean it's less important.
Dr Alan B Jones
Director Inspire NLP
Coach, Trainer, Author