Every now and then, you may ponder the complexities and maybe even some chaos in your life.
You might struggle to figure out what's next.
Maybe you feel confused at times about which way to go.
Have you thought about setting your life priorities to make your life easier?
When you're struggling to determine what's important to you, it's hard to make decisions.
What will you do next?
Where will you go for the evening?
Who will you choose to pass the time with?
Feeling torn between two or more people, places and things is common if you haven't yet identified your priorities. After all, when you consider everything and everyone in your life as all-equal in terms of their "level" of importance, it's going to be tough to choose what to do next.
Setting your life priorities is a way of identifying what's most important to you. Once you determine your priorities, you'll be pleased with the ease of making decisions and the serenity that comes with knowing you did the right thing.
Establishing priorities also gives you a clearer focus on how to allot your time. If you allot the bulk of your time to doing what's most important with the most important people in your life, you'll feel more fulfilled and satisfied with your life experiences.
Common Life Priorities
What might your priorities be?
The possibilities are endless. In the list below, you'll find many common priorities in no particular order.
Feel free to use the list as inspiration to help you figure out your own priorities.
* Extended family
* Personal appearance
* Health and physical exercise/activities
* Nutritious eating
* "Alone-time" with partner
* Quality time with the children
* Playing games on the internet
* Talking on the phone
* Watching television
Example of a "Prioritized" Listing of Life Priorities
The whole idea of setting priorities is to put the many elements of your life into an order, with those that are most important to you at the top.
Knowing your highest priority on the list is necessary in order to make focused, wise decisions that are right for you.
Consider this next list, which is prioritized, as an example of someone's life priorities (in order).
2. Alone-time with partner
4. Health and physical exercise
5. Nutritious eating
7. Watching television
8. Personal appearance
9. Hobbies - movies and reading
Coming Up With Your Own Priorities
Setting your priorities in life may take time and effort. However, taking the time to reflect on your day-to-day life and determine what's on the top of your list will make your life so much easier. Once your priorities are clear to you, decisions on how to spend your time and with who will be a cinch.
Engaging in this exercise of figuring out your priorities might reveal some things that shock or surprise you.
For example, you might realize that you're spending most of your time hanging out with friends even though you feel that your family is more important. Or you aren't taking as much care with your kids as you thought you were.
Regardless of what you discover that you weren't expecting, setting your priorities now will help you limit or even remove the less-important elements of your life and enable you to focus more fully on what means the most to you.
You can live more joyfully by setting your life priorities.
Knowing what's important to you and devoting your time to those things at the top of your list will ensure you experience an enriched and fulfilled life.
Set your life priorities today.
This coming Saturday is White Ribbon Day
The White Ribbon CampaignUK is part of a global movement to put a stop to male violence against women and girls.
This is very much a MANS issue, and it is women who are disempowered, harassed and abused by the behaviours of men.
The White Ribbon UK website notes that ...
Men and boys have a crucial role to play in creating a culture where male violence, abuse and harassment against women and girls are simply seen as unacceptable. We support them to take a stand against gender violence in their workplaces, schools, communities and families.
The 25th November, the world marks International Day for the Elimination of Violence against Women, also known as White Ribbon Day. From then until the 10th December, we encourage everybody to take part in the 16 Days of Activism against gender-based violence.
Most men are not violent towards women, but many of us ignore the problem, or see it as something which doesn't have anything to do with us. We need to join women and women's organisations in taking action to end the problem.
You can take a stand against violence now and sign our personal pledge never to commit, condone or remain silent about men's violence against women by visiting the White Ribbon Campaign Website
Created using Visme. An easy-to-use Infographic Maker.
Here's the final list in this short series of Tips for Change.
You do not have to do all thirty things, and some may not appeal to you. The idea is, however, for you to select one or two which will help you break your old habits and patterns...
21. Shut Down and Unplug – Take time off from technology and unplug from your social devices. If you want to be a better you, you need connections – real life connections. You need to see faces and hear voices and so do other people. Take the initiative and plan a real-life coffee date. You’ll make a difference for yourself and for someone else.
22. Pick and Choose Your Time – Only you can schedule your time productively. If you choose to scroll on Facebook or to stay up late and oversleep in the morning, the results may be an unfocused and unproductive life. Choose and schedule your time carefully and reap the positive benefits.
23. Set Attainable Goals – If you set your sights too high, you are more likely to fail. It’s ok to have one big goal but break it into smaller attainable goals to work towards. Completing these smaller goals will keep you motivated no matter how long it takes you to reach the final big goal.
24. Grab an Accountability Partner – When you set a new goal, it’s important to let people know about it. It’s also important to obtain an accountability partner. When you know you have to answer to your accountability partner and that others are watching your progress, you will work that much harder so you don’t disappoint anyone, including yourself. You also have that partner cheering you on from the sidelines.
25. Learn the Power of No – Learn how to say no; while difficult at first, it gets easier with time. Saying no frees you up to do what is necessary for a healthy, productive life.
26. Incorporate Health Routines – Never forget the importance of health routines. Keeping fit is your responsibility and it doesn’t have to be sixty hours of cardio or 100 pounds of weightlifting. A simple power walk will suffice, but do it daily and stick to it.
27. Pay Attention to What You Eat – You only have one body. How you feed it is up to you. A happy body needs the proper nutrients for brain power and health. Avoid foods that only drag the body down. When you eat right, you feel great.
28. Pay Attention to How You Eat – It’s just as important to pay attention to how you eat as it is to what you eat. Take your time, slow down and eat sitting down. Try not to talk while eating. Take a few minutes to digest after eating. While it is the practice of today’s society to “do lunch,” it’s important to breathe right and eat right for proper digestion.
29. Take a Time Out – Close your eyes and take a few deep breaths a few times a day, even if you have to go out to your car or take a bathroom break. A few minutes of deep breathing and relaxation can reset your mindset for the rest of the day.
30. Get the Proper Rest – Lack of sleep can make you feel bad and have negative thoughts. If you’re not getting enough sleep at night consider taking a power nap during the day. Even 15 minutes can reset you mood, creativity and your focus. Set your alarm for 15 minutes and watch how much more energized you will feel afterward.
Drink a glass of water before bedtime to hydrate your body and help it flush toxins. Drink another glass first thing in the morning before eating or drinking anything else to help kick start your organs.
By following these tips you are well on your way to a more balanced, focused, energized life. When you feel balanced, you’ll feel better about yourself and everything else around you.
So here's another list of Ten Tips for embracing change and breaking old habits ...
11. Listen to the Right Kinds of Music – Uplifting music will change your brain waves and fast music will give you a boost of adrenaline. If you are feeling low, pop on some dance tunes and watch how quickly your toes will begin to tap.
12. Start Your Day the Right Way – Start your day the right way with one positive thought, affirmation or conversation. If you read something positive, think something positive or say something positive, your day will be that much better and you will have done this by your own power.
13. Laugh it Off – Have you ever started your day by tripping over something, losing your car keys or finding that the raccoons knocked over your garbage pail? Rather than get upset, laugh it off as life stuff or sing a favorite song. You’ll be glad you did.
14. Smile a Little – Smiling releases serotonin. When something goes wrong or someone irritates you, smile about it. You will instantly feel better for being positive and you may help lift their bad mood too.
15. Be the Person You Envision – If you are seeking a mate in life or even if you want to attract more success – be the person that you envision successfully reaching those goals. Be someone who sets goals, takes risks and faces challenges with grace. While hard at first, the more you practice, the closer you will be to becoming that successful person.
16. Time to Get Organized – Set up a filing system, get a calendar and keep it updated, throw out your unnecessary junk. Once the initial work is done, all you have to do is maintain the organized systems.
17. Time Chunk – Chunk your time into sections and give yourself an allotted time frame for whatever you are doing and stick to it. Have you ever started cleaning out a closet in the bedroom and somehow found yourself cleaning the kitchen only to return to the bedroom and it’s still a mess? You’re not alone. Give yourself 30 minutes to clean out a closet and then when the time is up. Move on to the next chore. Do this at work and at home and you’ll find you get a lot more accomplished each day.
18. Use Your Cell Phone – Use your timer on your cell phone to time your tasks whether it is running errands or cleaning or making phone calls. Knowing how long you generally spend on these tasks can help you see where you can make improvements which will reduce the stress in your life.
19. Use Technology – Use your cell phone for reminders on your calendar; be it birthdays, appointments or remembering to take the clothes out of the dryer. Set up your bills to be automatically paid each month. Research online ahead of time where you’ll get the best deals before going shopping. Don’t be embarrassed or think you are failing at remembering. Instead consider it not having to worry about remembering because it’s done for you.
20. Get an App – There is an app for everything today from traveling to banking. When you are on the train or waiting in line at the store, you can things done that would normally have to wait for lunch hour or days off. Being able to accomplish more during these wait times will give you more free time for yourself.
The more, shall we say, cynical readers will recognise the 'buzz words' that constitute the title of this piece.
Mindfulness has been, for a number of years now, the at the forefront of the popular psychological press and, if the hype is to be taken at face value, is a global panacea for mental wellbeing.
Of course I would be one of the first to comment on the benefits of the practice of mindfulness, but to claim it is a magical cure-all is one step too far.
Recently, mindfulness seems to have faded in popularity and we are reading more and more about Resilience.
Resilience and being resilient is the new 'thing'. Of course, like its compatriot buzz word mindfulness, resilience is something that has been around for a long while now.
Let's get our terms defined...
RESILIENCE - is recognized as a developmental process, reflecting the capacity for positive adjustment in difficult life circumstances as opposed a set ability people are born with.
MINDFULNESS - as defined by psychology and not Buddhism, is a skill, which enhances adaptive coping to stressful events by the self-regulation of attention towards the immediate experience, and an open and accepting orientation towards one’s experience of the present (Bishop et al 2004).
One would imagine that an individuals ability to 'bounce back' from life's challenges and the ability to pay attention to internal processes would actually have an effect on an individuals perception of themselves.
This was the theme of a 2013 research paper by Keye & Pidgeo (link below) in which a link between mindfulness, resilience and 'self efficacy' were explored. They found that academic self-efficacy (ability of the individual to take control of their own efficient behaviours) were linked.
To be strict in our definitions, academic self-efficacy is defined as the interpretation individuals give to their own performance and achievement.
In the 2013 research suggests ...
"if mindfulness and academic self-efficacy predict resilience in students, then developing interventions that target increasing students’ mindful- ness and academic self-efficacy may be beneficial in strengthening resilience."
Extending some of the ideas in this paper, we could suggest the following...
Does this cycle suggest a clear link between these four 'abilities'.
This being the case then we might be able to discover points at which we could create coaching and therapeutic interventions.
Of course resilience is a bigger issue, and is something which develops within a framework of personal, social and environmental experiences, but this simple idea could open up some interesting discussion.
Link to the 2013 Research Paper
Dr Alan B JOnes
Director Inspire NLP